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The Potatoes

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Well, Girl Potato and Boy Potato


had eyes for each other,


and finally they got married,


and had a little sweet potato,


which they called 'Yam.'


Of course, they wanted the best for Yam.


When it was time,


they told her about the facts of life.


They warned her about going out


and getting half-baked,


so she wouldn't get accidentally mashed,


and get a bad name for herself like


'Hot Potato,'


and end up with a bunch of Tater Tots.


Yam said not to worry,


no Spud would get her into


the sack and make a rotten potato out of her!


But on the other hand


she wouldn't stay home


and become a Couch Potato either.


She would get plenty of exercise


so as not to be skinny


like her Shoestring cousins.


When she went off to Europe,


Mr. and Mrs. Potato told Yam


to watch out for the hard-boiled guys from Ireland.


And the greasy guys from France


called the French Fries.


And when she went out west,


to watch out for the Indians


so she wouldn't get scalloped.


Yam said she would stay on


the straight and narrow and wouldn't associate


with those high class Yukon Golds,


or the ones from the other side of the tracks


who advertise their trade


on all the trucks that say,


'Frito Lay.'


Mr. and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P.U.


(that's Potato University)


so that when she graduated


she'd really be in the Chips.


But in spite of all they did for her,


one-day Yam came home and announced


she was going to marry Brian Williams.


Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset.


They told Yam she couldn't


possibly marry Brian Williams because he's just.......


Are you ready for this?



Are you sure?





OK! Here it is!















Lifetimer since April 2001


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