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Guest Shodee06

Dealing with an over-weight partner...

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Guest Shodee06

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:welcome: ! The best advice I have is to lead by example. Sometimes DH & I are on the same page with WW and exercise. Other times one of us is invested and the other has their head in the sand. It's too much of a land mine to come right out and say it sometimes. But by providing an example of good nutrition and exercise, that should go a long way in either rubbing off on DB or else starting the conversations itself.

Kimberley

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Guest Shodee06

thanks kimberly! i will continue doing my WW and hopefully he'll become involved. it can be a touchy subject for sure. i appreciate your input :-)

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Guest BeanBlossom

I agree with Kimberly 100%. Lead by example. The fact that my husband is so great at sticking to a healthy lifestyle encourages me to stay on track. We started this journey together, and he's the one with the sticking power. He never has to say a word to me - just seeing him continue on motivates me to keep going.

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I also agree. You cant forced him and don't bug him about it either. He needs to come to it on his own. If he does it because you say so it just wont work.

 

He will come around, he just needs that example.

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Guest Hearts&Flowers

My DH lost about 30 lbs. three years ago. I have been on and off WW ten times since then. Thankfully he is just waiting around for me to join him and not saying anything. I'd hate to have to kill him after 22 years of marriage!

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ITA with the advice you've been given. I don't know your situation, but if you cook for him he may lose some weight just by the simple changes you have or will be making in how you cook :bcb_wink3

 

My DH lost about 30 lbs. three years ago. I have been on and off WW ten times since then. Thankfully he is just waiting around for me to join him and not saying anything. I'd hate to have to kill him after 22 years of marriage!

 

As someone who has been with my skinny husband for 20 years (married for 16) - I just wanted to say that this TOTALLY cracked me up. I can't stop chuckling :bcb_grin


~ Pam ~

homeschooling mom to 3 girls

"It's not that some people have willpower and some don't. It's that some people are ready to change and others are not." James Gordon, M.D.

 

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Guest BeanBlossom
My DH lost about 30 lbs. three years ago. I have been on and off WW ten times since then. Thankfully he is just waiting around for me to join him and not saying anything. I'd hate to have to kill him after 22 years of marriage!

 

 

That's great! My husband lost 30 pounds this year too. He did it in 5 months flat and I've been working on 20 pounds for about 2 years. He too is smart enough to keep his opinions, help, advice, to himself. :bcb_grin

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All of that advice is very nice. But I think you need to think about you in the long run and what you can live with. It is not selfish to think about YOU as HE is thinking about HIMSELF. Still a very gray area. Do want you want for you. Think about yourself and it is o.k. to be selfish as everybody is in their own way.

 

I don't mean to offend, just be realistic.

 

Lasvegasleader

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I agree with the lead by example advice.

 

Perhaps you can suggest ways to get in more activity like going for a walk, bike ride, swim etc.

 

If you do the cooking or buying groceries perhaps you can look for ways to cut back there without being obvious.

 

Lisa


SW 311.2, CW 168.4 Total lost 142.8 5'1"

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Why not just tell him your concerns about his long term health and then offer to be a work out buddy with him. After expressing your concerns though you need to back off and let it be his decision...no nagging. He may keep it in the back of his mind and be further inspiried after he sees your results.

 

I find that generally men are not as sensitive about their weight and don't have as much of their self-esteem wrapped up in weight as women do (one reason why they might mention your weight gain to you innocently). Most guys save their embarrasment for receeding hairlines.


Debbie

SW 193, CW 190

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don't pull the passive aggressive crap. Talk to him, tell him you love him, that he's getting fat and you're worried about his short and long term health. If you're feeling froggy then tell him while you still think he's attractive he's much more so when he's taking care of himself.


SW: 4/2/7- 339lbs

CW: 10/1/9- 194lbs--145 lbs LOST Slideshow

Running Log

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Dang, Padre! Don't hold back, now, tell us how you really feel.:bcb_grin

 

Actually, I rather enjoyed hearing this from a guys perspective. My DH is constantly standing on the scales whining and I tend to just keep quiet as I figure he has to come to it on his own. Heaven knows I am "leading by example" and he isn't following, so maybe it's time for a heart to heart. The truth may hurt but when presented with love and concern it just might get through.


Starting weight. 301.4

Current weight. 295.4

1st mini goal. 285

2nd mini goal. 275

3rd mini goal. 265. :bcb_march

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Dang, Padre! Don't hold back, now, tell us how you really feel.:bcb_grin

 

Actually, I rather enjoyed hearing this from a guys perspective. My DH is constantly standing on the scales whining and I tend to just keep quiet as I figure he has to come to it on his own. Heaven knows I am "leading by example" and he isn't following, so maybe it's time for a heart to heart. The truth may hurt but when presented with love and concern it just might get through.

 

I thought I was holding back when I didn't use the word "lardass".


SW: 4/2/7- 339lbs

CW: 10/1/9- 194lbs--145 lbs LOST Slideshow

Running Log

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